The Serial Panty Killer
by Boba Fart

Linda is hard at work at her designer panty store. She is hanging up new panties on their racks when she looks over at the rack beside her and screams bloody murder. The women in the store wonder what's wrong until they too, see the rack. It's a bad day for panty lovers.
Inside the office of police detective Jimmy Burns.
BILL: "As you know Jimmy, the cereal panty killer has struck again. This is the 3rd store she's hit.
JIMMY: Don't worry, I have a plan to catch her.
BOBBY: Excuse me guys, but what is a serial panty killer?
JIMMY: She's a woman who goes into clothing stores, acts like she's going to the dressing room to try on some panties, then when she's back there alone, she puts them on and farts so bad in them to the point that they're totally ruined, then puts them back on the rack.
BOBBY: oh, one of those.
BILL: And clothing stores are piss-pot tired of having damaged merchandise hanging on the racks and they want us to do something about it. Now what's your plan for catching her Jimmy.
JIMMY: I know where she's gonna strike next. Victoria's Secret store in the mall. Tomorrow they're getting in a new shipment of Pamala Anderson's designer panties. These panties are the best of the best. Silky, smooth, they even have strawberry scented threads sewed into the fabric so husbands can't tell when their wife farts...
BOBBY: Hey, I think my wife has a pair of those
JIMMY: Anyways, tomorrow I'm gonna go there and wait for our panty killer to show up. Don't worry I'll get her.
Bill: Isn't this world strange. Woman farting in panties for the sick pleasure of it. How disgusting.
JIMMY: .....yes.....how.....disgusting.
(what everyone doesn't know is that Jimmy is really a member of the secret society of female fart worshipers who have nightly meetings at Coprologist Fart Forum......JOIN THE CONSPIRACY BABY!!)

Inside Victoria's Secret Jimmy is watching the new panties, when he sees a fine brown hair woman with an ass that won't quit grab 10 pairs of panties and heads back to the dressing room. Jimmy goes behind the dressing room where there's a hole for him to watch. He sees this sexy brunette take off her pants and step into silky panties. She inches them up her waist then slightly bends her knees...and then......BBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLKKKKKKKKKKKKRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPppppppppppppppppbbbbbbbbpppppppppp....ppp....pp....rrrrrrrrrkkkkkkkkkkkccchhhhhhh..ppp.
It was the worst fart he had ever heard in his life. The smell hit him like an atomic blast. The panties were now a different color. Jimmy then bursted into the dressing room and says "That's it lady, you're under arrest." With a slight grin she says "I don't think so." Then yells out "HELP, RAPE." A bunch of women from the store come running in and see Jimmy standing in the womans dressing room with the woman in her panties. They throw him to the floor and say "how dare he, he's gonna pay for this, what should we do to him?" The brunette says "let's all put our butts around his face and fart at the same time." The girls formed a circle of butts around Jimmy's head and all Jimmy could think was "Oh, please don't throw me in the brier patch."
BRUNETTE: ready girls....on three.........1..........2........
JIMMY: In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida......baby
BRUNETTE: THREE!!!!!
PPPPLLLLLLLLLrrrrrrrrrrrrrbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbpppppppppp.
He died a happy man. Rest In Peace Jimmy!

WHEN THE GUYS AREN'T AROUND.........
BBBBBrrrrrrrrrrrrrpppppppppppp.....pppp.....rrrrkkkkk...pp..pppp